FORGIVENESS is the Answer

It’s been a while since the last time I write about the message of God to me. During those times I am struggling.  Questions starts to bother me, questions like “am I still doing the right thing?”  The guilt starts to consume me.  Doubts creep to my heart.  The feeling of hopelessness was present.  Why these things happened?  Because I happened to read a verse in the bible saying;

Forgiveness

But when you are praying, first forgive anyone you are holding a grudge against, so that you’re Father in heaven will forgive your sins too.

Mark 11:25 [NLT]

Everything went black. Everything I knew about God begins to falter and it really saddened me.  I was really afraid of what’s happening of what might become of me if I lose it all.

You might be wondering why I am feeling that way.  I happened to have a grudge to a person for seven years.  Imagine seven long years; I did a very good job of taking good care of that feeling.  For seven years I cultivated the seed of bitterness, imprisoned myself in the cell of anger and anxiety, and retribution becomes my passion.  That’s why the moment I happen to read the verse it really troubles me.  I don’t know why I’m so afraid of letting it go until one day God made his way through my heart.  How?  Last April 8, 9, and 10, 2011 I joined an Encounter activity.  The activity was really great, it taught me a lot of stuff that I never thought existed. 

Upon the activity I realized how much God loved me for He never gave up on me during those seven years of darkness.  He tried to reach out to me only I was blinded by my anger and fear.  I learned that God is indeed a kind, loving, generous, and forgiving God.  I already knew that God sent his only son to save those who are lost but that night was really amazing because that fact really hit me straight in the heart.  I realized how much His only son Jesus suffered for us to be saved and the moment Jesus died on the cross everything on earth was instantly cleansed.  The Lord forgave us the moment His son offered his own life and that’s when I realized that if God can forgive the sin of the world, who am I then to keep a grudge against someone?  Right then and their, my heart has been opened wide and I decided to gave up everything and let him took control over me.  God cleansed me, softened my hardened heart, took the darkness away from me, and instantly cured me.  Now, I’m free of doubts, fear, vengeance, anger, anxiety, and anything negative because God has cleansed me and my faith will never be shaken again because I know now how great to be the daughter of the Almighty Creator. 

Thank you Lord for the freedom you have given me.  I can finally pray to you with all my heart.  Forgiveness is the answer to all the pains I have been feeling during those dark seven long years.  Let us all learn to forgive. :)